How Can We Grieve & Be Grateful?

During your time of sorrow you may find it impossible to find anything to be grateful for.  But I assure you even during our darkest time there are things we can be grateful for.

I am going to suggest you remain open minded to gratitude, while you may be feeling sad and alone with your grief, there are other ways to look at this moment in time.

I have heard terrible stories of those who have lost their loved ones to tragic deaths and for those it is more difficult to find any gratitude. However…

 Gratitude can be a healer and a teacher.  Be open to gratitude and you will find comfort and peace.  Here are just a few examples of grateful thinking;

 

• Be grateful for the comfort & support you receive from others
• Find gratitude in the faces of children who see wonder and possibility in holiday traditions or whimsy
• Be grateful for your faith and the strength you gain for that faith
• Be grateful that you are able to write you thoughts in your journal everyday
• Find blessings in the kindness of strangers who have reached out
• Be thankful if you have a loving family
• Be grateful that you feel joy, peace and love during the holiday season despite your loss
• Be grateful for the tears, for they wash away the sadness of your loss and remind you that you are and have been loved
• Be grateful if you have a pet that offers you comfort in your time of grief

What do you find gratitude in?  Please share your comments below

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Day of the Dead – Remembering Family & Friends

Day of the dead is a celebration that honors and remembers family and friends that have died.

According to Wikipedia, they describe the holiday this way, it focuses on gatherings of family and friends to pray for and remember friends and family members who have died. It is particularly celebrated in Mexico, where it attains the quality of a National Holiday. The celebration takes place on November 1st and 2nd, in connection with the Catholic holidays of All Saints’ Day (November 1) and All Souls’ Day (November 2). Traditions connected with the holiday include building private altars honoring the deceased using sugar skulls, marigolds, and the favorite foods and beverages of the departed and visiting graves with these as gifts.

Scholars trace the origins of the modern Mexican holiday to indigenous observances dating back hundreds of years and to an Aztec festival dedicated to a goddess called Mictecacihuatl. In Brazil, Dia de Finados is a public holiday that many Brazilians celebrate by visiting cemeteries and churches. In Spain, there are festivals and parades, and, at the end of the day, people gather at cemeteries and pray for their dead loved ones. Similar observances occur elsewhere in Europe, and similarly themed celebrations appear in many Asian and African cultures.

I for one think many of our cultures should find more ways in which we publicly honor our loved ones that have died.  Often in American culture (which is all I am qualified top speak on) we tend to only remember our loved ones on significant dates to our dearly departed and at that many people tell me they do this privately.  I have taken some time to learn more about how the Mexican culture celebrates and honors their loved ones with great joy and celebration and I for one rather like this tradition.  To honor another in joyful celebration to me really gives meaning to me that this person I cared so deeply for mattered and I am here to publicly acknowledge their life.

What do you think?  I’d love your comments below about this celebration or any other that your culture may have to honor and celebrate a life.

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Faith & Healing from Grief

Often our faith and spiritual belief’s are shaken to the core following the death of a loved one particularly if it is someone who has died at a young age.  We ask why?  How could a loving God make this happen?  Often we are angry at our God for taking away our loved one.

To me this is where having faith comes in, faith is trusting in the unknown or unproven.  Faith is knowing and accepting life as it is.    As the author Mike Dooley so appropriately states, “Faith acknowledges that you’re not faced with living life alone, and that you have invisible friends and energy to draw on for guidance and comfort.” Whatever your faith is, and however it is that you pray or speak your thoughts to something greater than ourselves, it is having faith that tells us someone is listening.

Does having faith taken away the pain of our sorrow?  For some believers it does.  There is peace in letting go and letting God or whatever spiritual being you have faith in to comfort us to handle our grief.

I have talked to literally hundreds of bereaved people and there is a common thread that eventually emerges from the deep sorrow and that is that they have faith that their life continues to have purpose and meaning and the memories of the loved ones lost are solid and always apart of their life.

If you find yourself questioning your faith, that is normal. I encourage you to have a conversation with a spiritual leader in your community and talk through your feelings of anger and despair.

If you’re open to uplifting, inspirational reading please check out Mike Dooley. He is one of my favorite authors. I keep his book “Notes From The Universe” on my nightstand.

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Where is God in Grief?

By Christine Sandor

Crisis of most any kind brings our spirituality to the forefront of our world. The death and loss of a loved one is a traumatic time and one during which we often turn to our spirituality for support. Witnessing or experiencing the passing of one we love, is a harsh reminder of our own mortality and can easily induce questions about our own life worth. Our spiritual beliefs provide a meaning, if you will, to the dying process and death itself. It is through these beliefs that comfort is often found.

The term “spirituality,” does not necessarily refer to the religion with which you identify. Though certainly spirituality and religion are often viewed as one and the same, they are just as often seen as complete opposites. There is a broader meaning. Spirituality for many consist of relationships, meanings that are given to life and death, and our passion, commitments, and connections. For some, religion is where they go to church or temple, whereas spirituality is found in nature, meditation, or a personal relationship with a named or unnamed higher power. It not necessarily a creed-it is a way of being.

Understanding how we make sense of life helps us tremendously in how we make sense of death. There is a connection between the places in which we have found meaning in our world and what we perceive to be the meaning of the end of life as we know it. Those places and situations can change throughout our lives, as well. What you knew and believed as a child may not be what you adhere to now. It is helpful to look at how you have progressed and changed on your own spiritual journey.

The death of a loved one suddenly reminds us of our own mortality. It is a time at which we seem to automatically consider what really happens after death. We find ourselves thinking about what really does happen when the body ceases to function. Our spiritual understanding is the only resource we have at this time, as we often have no personal experience to help us. Unless you are among those who have had a near-death experience yourself, knowing whether there is an after-life and what it is like is based solely on what our religious background and current belief system have suggested.

Often it is our spiritual beliefs that decrease our anxiety and fears about death. Embracing your beliefs and spirituality can ease your worries.

Pray is an important piece of this process. If we think in terms of our thoughts being prayers to the Universe, we are always praying! There is, of course, absolutely nothing wrong with folding our hands, kneeling down, and asking the God of our beings to assist us and others. Prayer in this manner is perhaps more beneficial for us. What we are doing when we pray for help, is turning our problems over to the Divine. There comes a time when we are so overwhelmed that turning it over to God is precisely what we need to do. Experiencing grief is one of those times.

As part of the healing process, having a place to take the feelings and share them helps us to not always have to hold onto them, especially when they become too overpowering. The act of “giving it over to God” can be a powerful release for many. In some religions there are specific prayers for the dead. In Jewish tradition, for instance, the Kaddish, also known as the “The Mourners’ Kaddish,” is said as part of the mourning rituals in services, as well as at funerals and memorials. In other traditions, the 23rd Psalm is often recited, or a rosary is said. Some feel that prayer is one of the greatest acts of charity that can be given for the departed. It certainly has the ability to relieve anxiety and even depression.

Grief is a difficult process. By turning to God of our being our Spiritual understanding we are able to seek guidance on the road to healing.

Christine is the author of “This is not Goodbye: A holistic guide to helping children” And “Warming the Stone Children.” She is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Ordained Minister. Her work can be seen at her site: http://www.christinesandor.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_Sandor

http://EzineArticles.com/?Where-is-God-in-Our-Grief?&id=3644849

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Is There Life After Death?

I was listening to spiritual teacher Dr. Wayne Dyer talk on his weekly radio program this week about grief. Continue reading “Is There Life After Death?” »

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What Can Faith Do to Heal Your Grief?

I talk with people about their losses all the time and it seems evident to me that more often than not it is ones faith that see’s them through their darkest, most difficult times.  Continue reading “What Can Faith Do to Heal Your Grief?” »

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Memorial Day – A Day to Remember

Memorial Day is that day we set aside to honor those who have served in our military and died.  Regardless of our political opinions on war and the military, today let us all honor those who had the courage to serve this country with honor.  I thank you.

On this memorial weekend many people honor and pay respects to loved ones who have died.  I accompanied my Dad to visit the graves of my Mom, my grand parents, aunts and uncles.  We reminisced   about fond memories, shared a laugh or two as well as a private reflection.  I smiled as my Dad brushed off the dirt from the headstone where my Mom was laid to rest, pulled a couple of weeds and replaced old flowers with new.  He spoke a few words out loud to her and I was sure she was listening.

As we drove out of the cemetary I was deeply moved by the hundreds of flags I saw waving in the wind honoring those who died in service of our country, and all the beauty of the new flowers brightly adorning a site where someone was remembered.  Visiting a cemetary can be an important ritual to mourning because it helps us embrace our loss and remember those who have died.   If the body was cremated and the ashes not buried such as the case with my late husband, you may chose to visit the site where you scattered the ashes. Whatever rituals we choose to honor our loved ones who have died, it’s a time to give pause and thanks for those people who have shared your life.

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Having Faith

Regardless of your religious faith or spiritual beliefs, there have been studies done that show prayer can aid in the grieving and healing process.  So if you believe, there is power in prayer.  Pray for yourself, for strength to endure the pain of your grief, pray for your loved one who has passed, pray for other family members affected by the death of your loved one.

If you believe, then you will be comforted by the power of prayer. If you belong to a church, ask that your church pray for you and your dearly departed.

If you believe then you will be comforted to better days ahead.

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Those Who Die Still Live

I just read a lovely post by Marianne Williamson I wanted to share with you.  She wrote about the passing of the actress Natasha Richardson and the spiritual perspective that those that die still live.  “It is not the reality of death, but only our belief about its reality, that ultimately causes us sorrow and pain.” I hope you will CLICK HERE and read the entire story.

with  love & inspiration,

JoAnne Funch

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God Opens Doors

An inspirational thought of peace for those who believe in God or a higher power.
When God leads you to the edge of the cliff, trust Him fully and let go, only 1 of 2 things will happen,
either He’ll catch you when you fall, or He’ll teach you how to fly! ‘The power of one sentence!
God is going to shift things around for you today and let things work in your favor.

God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close.
Have a blessed day and remember to be a blessing…

(click on the dove!)

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