Choose Words That Comfort Grief

May 16, 2009 by JoAnne
Filed under GRIEF SUPPORT

When you talk to someone who is grieving, words often don’t come, you don’t know what to say. But remember that the one who is grieving does want to hear from you. May I suggest you don’t ask questions like, “How Are You Doing?” because when your logical mind thinks about that question, how do you think someone would be doing who just lost a loved one? Rather, ask a more specific question like, “Can I help with anything around the house this week?” or “I’m sure you are overwhelmed right now, but I will check on you again next week” and be sure that you do follow-up. To speak to someone immediately following a death a better statement might be, “I can’t imagine the sorrow you are feeling right now, but know that I am here whenever you need support”

Another suggestion is, don’t assume someone else is going to step in and help, because if everyone thinks that way the one grieving will have little to no support. Amazingly once the funeral is over, people move on except those grieving, that is the time when support is needed most. Also don’t be afraid to ask how you can help and sometime it might require a gentle push, but the effort and support will never be forgotten.

Any other suggestions are welcomed, please comment below or email me at; joanne@heartachetohealing.com

My Book, “I Don’t Know What To Say” is a wonderful reference for every family, because we all face death at sometime.