Grief & Loss – Life Changing, Growth Optional

One of my favorite quotes before I was widowed and remains today is “Life is change, Growth is optional. Choose wisely.” This quote is framed on the wall above my desk. 

Following the death of my husband in 2005 everything changed.  Grief and loss changed everything.  I no longer had a life partner or my business partner. I didn’t like this change, not one I asked for but then in retrospect, many of life’s changes are not welcomed, they just are part of life. It took me 19 months of grieving, pity parties, self examination, peer support, family support and lots of praying before I looked change in the eye and said, “Okay, you can’t go back JoAnne, so now what?” I became open to new possibilities and they came, I asked for ideas and support and it came, I made decisions and stuck to them and I simply made the decision to be a part of life again. I continued to cry once in awhile, I grieved the past and hung on to the memories. I found ways to honor my husband’s memory while I moved forward to explore what life had in store for me now. Death taught me about life and I treasured all the moments I have to be alive and believed I have gifts to give the world.  I discovered I didn’t need all the answers, but I had faith in myself, in the people who believed & supported me and in God and that is enough.

Grief & loss teaches us about life, how have you grown?

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One Response to Grief & Loss – Life Changing, Growth Optional

  • Joanne,

    This post will help so many who are new to grief.

    I know after my sister died, I wondered how anyone survives this beast called grief. But over time, as you wrote, you do realize you have a choice. And I do see grief now as gifting me being able to see life without blinkers on. For appreciating every little thing I have.

    And while I’d give anything to have my mum, sister and daughter back, I do see that grief has taught me to ‘live’ and enjoy and appreciate every little thing!

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts, it will give others hope.
    with love

    Diana Doyle x

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