Life After Loss

We all lose loved ones.  Some are gone before we really get to know them.  Others are taken just on the brink of  seeing how much the world really has to offer them.   So very many are lost in the prime of their life.  Others must wait what seems to be an eternity and we wonder what holds them here after living a full life.

Regardless of how we lose them the pain and grief some days seems endless and unbearable due to loves and bonds so strong  they extend beyond mortal comprehension.  There is life after loss.

We know we’ll never forget them but we want the rest of the world to know and remember them with us.   We look for opportunities  to talk about them and ways to memorialize them.

We erect shrines in their memory in the form of benches and gardens.  We plant trees knowing at least they will out live us to somehow carry on the memory of our loved one.  We donate our time in their honor.  We place objects that remind us of them strategically throughout our day to day lives.  We contribute to charities in their names.  In essence we look for every way possible to  immortalize our loved ones because we will always hold them close to our hearts.

So we live our lives in a relentless effort to make their death count for something and to make the loss of our loved ones have a special purpose, because for them to just simply be gone for no apparent reason other than it was somehow their time just isn’t good enough for us.

The saving grace in all of this is that yes, in some cases our loved ones do live on in the form of a effort that takes on a life of its own.  It helps others, it gives beauty to others, or it gives justice to others.  Perhaps it literally feeds and clothes others,  perhaps it carries others through trying times emotionally.  Most of all these ideas and desires are what keep us moving forward  to live our lives with purpose and fulfillment and a passion to somewhat fill the void we’re left with when we lose our loved ones.  Because we know they want us to find our new normal.  They want us to find a passion for life again, and they want us to keep moving forward.

Thoughts shared by Jan LaPitz

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